Tuesday, 28 June 2016

d10 Supervillains

from doom patrol
  1. HOT MINUTE. Can move at supersonic speeds between 9:00 and 9:01 in the morning. Is robbing every bank in the city one by one. Stop her by finding her lair and identity, but be prepared for retaliation if she discovers you're investigating her. She could probably just instantly kill you the next morning, depending on how harshly you want to run this.
  2. STOPLIGHT. Robot with glowing green globe for a head. When the globe turns yellow, that's a warning it's about to turn red. When the globe turns red, everyone in the vicinity is frozen in time until it turns green again. Hijacks armoured cars in tandem with gang of armed robbers.
  3. HITBOX. Exerts telekinetic control over the size and shape of everything's hitbox. Can shrink her own so your attacks pass right through everything but her abdomen or expand yours so she can blow up your head by shooting the air to your left. Highly-paid assassin.
  4. LAMPREY LAD. An abandoned child raised by lampreys in the East Anglian fens. Now in command of an amphibious army of lampreys, he intends to take back the seas from the human intruders, starting by draining the blood from lone swimmers and ending with a fullscale assault on the city of London. Twelve years old.
  5. CHIAROSCURO. Can enter any painting and bring stuff out from inside. Steals key items from masterpieces - Magritte's apple, Dali's watch, Vermeer's earring, etc. Can also move between adjacent paintings like the people in the portraits on the walls of Hogwarts. Can't do photographs.
  6. CROWN-OF-THORNS. Any severed part of her contains her whole personality and memory and will grow a new her if left alone for long enough. Covered in poisonous spines. Will sell you fingers as grow-it-yourself goons in exchange for delicious coral.
  7. HOAX. Has the power to make any lie become true. Queen of a fictional island created by a newspaper as a joke, populated by furred trout, tree octopi, jackalopes and Fiji mermaids. Courtiers are exiled royalty from Formosa, Abyssinia and the South Seas. Eats the fruit of spaghetti trees. Playful. Kidnaps children.
  8. BIRD LORD. Believes they can talk to birds and have control over birds. This is false. Fights on behalf of the birds. Lives on a roof. A successful investment banker until their mind was broken by a glancing encounter with the Simurgh.
  9. APE-X. Brilliant physicist from a distant future in which apes rule the Earth. Cast out from the Science Council for his irresponsible experiments with Time Itself, he escaped into the past, where he plans to conquer the planet with advanced technology and make it into the capital of a trans-temporal empire. Hunted by the superteam PRIME-8.
  10. POWDER MONKEY. Monkey with a blunderbuss and a pirate hat. Highly-paid assassin.

Saturday, 25 June 2016

d10 Superheroes

  1. BLACKMOLD. Infected with a fungus that compels her to fight crime. Can exhale a paralyzing spore-cloud that cuts ten years off your life-span and gives you weekly migraines till you die, at which point mushrooms will grow from your body. Anything that eats the mushrooms becomes compelled to fight crime. Convinced that fighting crime was her own idea, will resist any suggestion to the contrary. Looks like Catwoman as played by Janeane Garofalo.
  2. THE RED MESSAGE. Hipster grandchild of Communists who left China in the thirties to proselytise to the American tongs. Equipped with jet-powered rollerblades, a grappling hook and a Mao suit, he plans to spread his radical red message to the funky streets of Brooklyn. Listens to Kasabian. Fights crime, insofar as all property is theft. 
  3. STROBE. Flickers in and out of reality at a frequency of her choosing, giving you headaches with a look and seizures with a touch. Can be invisible to video cameras or under halogen lights. Archnemesis is criminal mastermind with epilepsy.
  4. THE GREEN FEDORA. Learned katana mastery on the internet. Years of training against watermelons and Pepsi bottles in his parents' basement has prepared him to combat the forces of oppression and injustice everywhere they rear their ugly heads. Sidekick is a pillow.
  5. THE MONOCLE. Gentleman thief who stole an experimental utility monocle from the people who make gadgets for James Bond. X-Ray vision, heat vision, augmented reality. Would never look at your dick with the X-Ray vision because he is a gentleman.
  6. SINKHOLE. Can transform at will into a sinkhole. Wherever they're standing, now a sinkhole is there. Anything that falls inside her will be carried around until she chooses to vomit it up, which she can do in both human and sinkhole form.
  7. DOC POSITIVE. Physically springy. Bullets bounce off his chest. Bad guys hit by him go flying across the room with comical noises like they've been whacked with a piston-powered trampoline. Can leap tall buildings in a single bound and do that jumping coin punch Mario does in Smash Bros. Relentlessly upbeat and immune to sour vibes. Had all his bad energy sucked out of him by a scientist and put in a bottle somewhere.
  8. DOC TOPICAL. Has powers based on whatever's been in the news most recently. Brexit grants power to sever bonds between things, weed legalisation grants power to control smoke and fire, etc. Actually a secret experiment by Twitter to weaponise hashtags and harness the power of meme magic.
  9. GOATSONG. Owns a phone directory of Hell. Each demon owes her a favour. When all seventy-two favours are used up, gets dragged screaming into Hell.
  10. BOGMAN. A Neolithic superhero who was hurled into a Scottish peat bog by the legions of his enemy, the Bronze Wizard, after having dealt that foul sorcerer what seemed to be a mortal blow. He was preserved in a state of suspended animation for thousands of years by the mammoth-bone amulet that gave him his powers before being dug up by people constructing a golf course. Now he is a friendly bog mummy with super strength. The Bronze Wizard has also come back to life and is a rich property developer.
Additional bonus superteam: OCTOPUS SQUAD. Eight people, each of whom has one of the powers of the octopus. In emergencies they all hold hands to fuse like Captain Planet into a giant octopus. Inspired by Finding Dory.
  1. Flexible and rubbery. Can squeeze through tiny gaps.
  2. Four extra arms. Knows kung fu.
  3. Changes colour and skin texture to blend with her surroundings.
  4. Releases clouds of mystifying, lighter-than-air ink.
  5. Sucker cups on limbs. Can climb anything.
  6. Wrist siphons. Propels self around, knocks down enemies with jets of pressurised water.
  7. Paralysing touch, poisonous saliva.
  8. Can psychically predict the result of football matches.

Wednesday, 22 June 2016

Dandelion Men

Dandelion men have slender flexible stalklike bodies and a variety of limb configurations, most of them within one standard deviation of human. When they're young their heads are yellow rosettes. As they grow older their florets shrivel and are replaced with bristly white seeds.

Younger dandelion men wear colourful skintight patchwork harlequin suits. Older dandelion men wear long flapping raggedy robes consisting of many layers of translucent cloth. This is to inform them of the slightest change in the wind.

Younger dandelion men are fearless bravados who leap from adventure to adventure, never tiring as long as they have a supply of water and sunshine. They sing ballads, fight duels, woo beautiful ladies and lords. (Of other races: dandelion men are genderless and reproduce asexually. It doesn't make sense that they would pursue romance, but it doesn't make sense that they would willingly seek out danger, either.). Older dandelion men are grizzled, cautious, regretful and wise. They write epic poetry, command armies and settle down in polygamous friend-marriages with small groups of other dandelion men. They dwell either in the dandelion city of Taraxacum, which has very crooked streets, very high walls and windsocks everywhere, or in foreign dandelion ghettos that reproduce this architecture in miniature. They're a bit like medieval Jews, holding down "clever" jobs like lending money or advising the king but generally distrusted and always on the look-out for the next pogrom. The wildness of the younger dandelion men can hurt them here, like if one seduces the wrong prince or whatever, but it can also make them more relatable.

The green stalkflesh of dandelion men is bitter but healthful, and can be used to make a delicious and medicinal liqueur. Dandelion men are also knows as blowballs, clocks, lion's teeth, milkwitches, cankerworts, priestcrowns and puffballs, some of which are derogatory and some of which they have ironically reclaimed.

When all of a dandelion man's bristly white seeds are blown away, it will die. Only a small percentage of the seeds will take root somewhere that a young dandelion man can grow. Whether or not it's moral to uproot a young dandelion man should you find it sprouting in your garden, still in the pre-sentient, attached-to-the-earth stage, is a hotly debated moral question, but most people will just do it anyway. If you are nice to a dandelion man while it grows, watering it and protecting it from bugs, it will be your friend when it begins to bloom. They take about a year to go from being planted to full intellectual maturity. They live about ten years, on average.

from the tv show pushing daisies

Here is where the rules for playing as a dandelion man should go but I can't be bothered to figure it out. Strong wind removes your seeds, keep track of how many you have, get some kind of dex and int bonus to compensate. They make good rogues and warlords if anyone is still doing warlords. I can't really see them using that much magic, definitely not fire magic, but I can imagine there might be such a thing as a dandelion man's curse.

have you seen the stellaris aliens. you should